In October of 2003 I became a first-time mom to a beautiful baby boy.
From the moment I found out I was pregnant, I knew I was having a little boy. It just felt right. I wasn’t a natural nurturer and didn’t have much experience with babies and when the time came to take him home from the hospital, I was terrified! I remember sitting in my rocking chair at home and thinking, “Now what?” But that little baby grew up before my eyes! In the years that followed he was joined by a baby brother…
… and then another…
… and then another…
When I found out I was expecting my 4th baby boy, to be completely honest I felt disappointed. It was not because I didn’t want another beautiful bouncing boy but because people had made me feel that I “needed” to have a baby girl to make my family “complete”. I heard people say that I had to keep “trying” until I got my girl, telling me how sorry they were, or consoling me by saying that things would be okay because we make cute boys. How do you respond to that? “Ok…um…thanks?” Instead of congratulations I felt like I was receiving condolences everywhere I went. Things were getting me down when it dawned on me that I didn’t care what others thought. I love each and every one of my crazy boys and I love this life we are creating together and wouldn’t change it for anything. Do I love every minute? Oh heck no! But I wouldn’t have my life any other way.
My 4th baby was in a hurry to come to our family and arrived 4 weeks early but perfect and healthy in every way. Exactly what any mom would hope for. My mind kept going back to the things I had heard and the comments that were made to me in the weeks and months before his birth and I didn’t want other moms to feel the way that I had felt and I didn’t want my boys to think, even for a minute, that I wished they were little girls or that I didn’t love them with my entire heart. That is when The Joys of Boys blog was born, as a place to celebrate the little men in our lives. There are so many websites designated to all things girly but not many for little boys.
My life is far from “perfect”. So if you’re looking for a perfect mother raising perfect children, you’ll have to look somewhere else. Our home is often messy (That’s an understatement!) it’s loud (seriously, why does it have to be SO loud?), and there are times when this mom needs a TIME OUT! But there is a lot of love and a lot of fun.
I hope this blog is a great resource for you and that through the chaos, craziness and sometimes even loneliness you may feel in being a mom to boys that you can learn to focus on the joys that your boys bring into your life.
Cherlyn Jenkins says
I love that you have this blog for boys!! I have 2 boys and we are done. I don’t even want a girl. I am sharing your website with a friend who has been getting the condolence comments and it is getting her down. Thanks for sharing.
Ah..Thanks! Boys are so fun but I know those comments can be hard at times. Thanks so much for visiting and I hope to get to know you and your friend. 🙂 We “boy moms” need to stick together!
This is awesome, i just read your story and it is very true I have 3 boys and got the condolences, and the “you need to keep trying” comments. My husband really wanted a girl, but it just doesn’t seem to be in the cards for us, and that is ok. I was a little sad when i found out I was having another boy but I just started thinking of all the positives like they will always have some one to play with and no one will be left out.
Christine Kiehl says
Such a delightful story and pics, thank you for sharing! Love your blog~!