The day I became a mom was one of the happiest (and most terrifying) days of my life. That sweet little boy grew up before my eyes and was followed by a baby brother…and then another…and then ANOTHER! 4 boys! How on earth did I become a mom to 4 boys?
My entire life I had planned on having at least one daughter. But, God had other plans. And here I was, the mother of 4 boys. I had a choice to make. I could either feel sad and mourn the daughter I would never have, or I could learn to embrace being a mom of all boys.
There was a period of sadness, and it still creeps in every once in awhile (watching others do mommy/daughter things together can be HARD!), but my life is one that I wouldn’t change and being a mom to 4 boys has been and will forever be the one of the things that brings me the most joy. Right up there with my marriage to their daddy! 🙂
So while I think it is normal to feel some sadness if you had always hoped for having a daughter, there are so many great ways that you can embrace being a mom of all boys.
15 Ways to Embrace Being a Mom of All Boys
Being a mama is tough cookies, and being a mama of all boys is a whole different level of adventure. Not only are you outnumbered in the child to parent ratio, but also in the female to male ratio. (Seriously, there is SO much Testosterone in my house and too many little guys who have the desire to destroy things!) Though being a mama of all boys has different challenges, I embrace being a mama of all boys and here is how:
Jump in and Play
Let’s face it. Boys alone can be rough on things, but when you get them in a group, they just have this instinct to wrestle or destroy! Boys like to rough house, goof around, and have fun. As adults, we have to keep things from getting out of hand (a fun wrestling match can turn into a fist-slinging brawl in an instant), but make sure to take the time to get involved in the fun as often as you can. I love seeing my boys laugh and enjoying a good water fight, a race to the house, or an intense game of MarioKart and it is much more fun when I take the time to participate. (They love it too!)
Teach Your Boys How to Treat a Lady
Though we may butt heads on things like putting the toilet seat down, raising a generation of respectful, caring boys is something that I feel passionate about. Since I have 4 boys, I feel that I can make a small difference in the generations that will come. When it comes to being a boy-mama, we are the first influence they have and we can use that influence to help them grow into strong, compassionate and loving men who will respect the women in their lives and the woman that they will one day marry.
Realize that Mamas are a Boy’s First Love
No matter how grown a boy gets, he will always love his mama. Nothing ever quite compares to the love between a mother and son. Though other women will come into your son’s life, you will always be their first love. My boys really are sweet to me (most of the time!) and every night before bed I have a hard time leaving my youngest boys’ room because they have to out-do each other in how much they love me. “I love you more than all the planets in the entire universe!”, or I love you more than 100 plus 12!! And then there are lots of squeezes and loves from them.
Be Glad that Shopping is Fairly Quick and Easy
Shopping for my boys is the BEST!! My boys don’t have to try on every outfit, pair of jeans, or shirt to see how it looks. In fact, they don’t much care to go shopping. I’ve never been big on shopping. In fact, I kind of despise having to go to multiple stores looking for outfits (online shopping is my friend!) Since my boys are fairly simple to shop for, I like to take them on one-on-one shopping trips to their favorite store so they can get just the right things. One hour in and out, then DONE! Fantastic!
Take an interest in their hobbies
My four boys are completely different and they each have different things that interest them. Honestly, I couldn’t care less about Minecraft or Mario Smash Bros and following professional sports teams has never been my thing, but my boys like to talk and talk and talk about them. Even if I don’t have a clue what they are talking about, I can take the time to listen when they want to share. I’m actually pretty scared that one day they won’t come to me and tell me all of the latest and greatest news. If they can talk to me about the little things now, then I hope that they will always want to talk to me about the big things later in their life.
I asked moms in my Moms of Boys Community to answer how they embrace being a mom of all boys and here are some of their responses:
“I never imagined a life with all boys. I was the pink glittery high heels makeup just to go to the store girly girl. Embracing being a mom to onlyboys didn’t mean a part of me died a part of me grew. I’m still a girly girl I’m just now the girly girl at monster jam and wwe matches or standing in the rain helping tie cleats and strap his helmet I’m the mom that finds jock straps in my purse and on my stove. Sure I’m WAY out numbered but they have taught and helped me grow in as many areas as I have them.” – Kim K.
“As a mom of 4 little boys the house is always loud and crazy. I’ve learned to enjoy it and not let it bother me. They are only small for a short time before they will want to be hanging out with friends or hiding in their rooms and I will miss the craziness. My biggest thing is that I pick the battles that are worth fighting. There is going to be crying, fighting, wrestling, and injuries but they also need to learn through all of those things and me as the mom doesn’t always need to jump in the middle of it. They need to learn how to solve problems. And as a mom of boys there will be injuries! Just remember to stay calm. It goes by fast, so cherish the craziness and even better yet, join in on it!” – Kate F.
“Having all boys means I need to learn to embrace God’s plan he has for me; raising them up as warriors for God. It means that for this season in my life I get to be the queen; just because I have all boys doesn’t mean I can’t still have feminine touches in my decor.” – Nicole J.
“Revel in the fact that I never have to do somebody’s hair!
Live in a drama free world.” – Sonia T.
“Understanding that the dreams of shopping sprees and trips to nail salons has been traded in for trucks and sports is awesome because now I have this boy who is the kindest, loving little guy and I’m responsible for turning him into a man that knows how to treat people. Its an amazing gift.” – Melanie H.
“I have the amazing opportunity to raise strong, respectful, caring, kind, and hardworking men. Without my boys I would not have that opportunity and this world needs more men that were raised right. That is how I embracebeing a boy mom.”- Felicia M.
“There is nothing I wouldn’t do with my boys. They shop with me, watch classic movies, help me cook, we have dance parties… I have never felt that I was missing out by not having a daughter.” – Emily B.
“For me it is learning how to take people’s negative comments, “Oh, you’re going to have your hands full!” Or “Oh man, you didn’t get your girl, huh?” And ignoring them. I love all of my boys and wouldn’t change them!” Monica K.
“Embracing being a boy mum is being comfortable knowing the names of all the different bugs and how to contour my face.” – Alex O.
” I have found myself becoming more girly in order to embrace me.” -Nikki L.
How do you embrace being a mom of all boys? How has being a mom of all boys changed your view in life? Share your thoughts, love, and encouragement in the comments below!
If you are a mom of ALL boys, you will also like:
Yes, I’m Raising Boys, and No, I’m not sorry
You Might Be Raising a Boy if…
I also have only boys. I also was initially disappointed not to have a girl but got over that really fast. My boys are awesome! They are teens and a tween and they still wrestle and fight. I don’t think they grow out of that, actually. I think my sense of fashion has changed as a result of having boys. It’s a rare day I don’t wear something with a sports team logo on it!
I have 5 boys ages 11,9, 6, 5, 4! Needless to say everyday is an adventure. I have always wanted a girl but i honestly have no clue what to do a girl after having all boys. They are a blast.
I have 5 boys now One aged 23 and Four aged 21. Yes, one older and quadruplets. How do
I keep that bond? I worked hard to be their solid/their rock,
Anyone out there holding on as well.